Being Real—Abiding in Him

“I am the vine; you are the branches. The one abiding in Me and I in him, he bears much fruit. For apart from Me you are able to do nothing.” John 15:5 Berean Literal Bible

“You become. It takes a long time. That’s why it doesn’t happen often to people who break easily, or have sharp edges, or who have to be carefully kept. Generally by the time you are REAL, most of your hair has been loved off, and your eyes drop out and you get loose in your joints and very shabby. But these things don’t matter at all, because once you are REAL you can’t be ugly, except to people who don’t understand.” Marger Williams, The Velveteen Rabbit

I’m sure you’ve read the Footsteps story where there are two sets of footprints in the sand and then there are only one set of footsteps — it was Jesus who carried the storyteller. Us.


Remain. Rest in Him. Trust his plan. Let go and let God. Seek him and all will be added.

Bear much fruit. There are times we can’t see where we have any fruit. During my husband’s Lewy body dementia and death, it was all I could do to hang on. Prayers were without words. There weren’t any to describe this time in my life. I have some painful memories and regrets from this time but years later, I can see fruit. Someone remarked, “It takes a day to grow a mushroom but a lifetime for a mighty oak.” Or words to that effect. The point is God causes the growth. We abide. Remain. Trust. I can attest that I have fruit that has helped dementia caregivers but it took a long, long time for harvest. The only and most perfect thing I did was abide in my Father. He carried me. Grace.

Becoming. I’m much more real now. Conversations with my Father are minute by minute. I abide like a little child playing in the presence of loving parents with security and contentment. The child does not strive, worry or fix. The child abides.


Until I have a relationship with the Father through his Son, I’m not abiding. I’m going in my own strength and it’s exhausting! The Father wants a relationship with you and me. The more intimate, the more real we become and the more fruit for our lives and the Father’s Kingdom.


Dear Father,

We thank you for your constant presence in our lives and the intimate relationships we have with you. Remind us that striving, fixing, earning, worrying, approval-seeking is going in our own strength and not abiding in your presence. We do what we can and rest in your plan. We are your little children.


Published by Barbara Hinther

Barbara Hinther author of Meditations and Encouragement for the Caregiver of a Loved One with Dementia and What About Me, God. Time to share what she has learned and hopefully, others will know they are not alone. This too, shall pass with beautiful, yet painful, lessons. Barbara lives in a rural town in Idaho where all is community. Bless everyone in the community for their support and their never-ending let’s pitch in attitude! She worked in marketing for over 30 years and volunteered with the Idaho Youth Ranch and St. Vincent’s de Paul Thrift Store. Then her hardest job ever was caring for her husband who died from Lewy body dementia and needed her full-time care. Feelings of abandonment were constant. Life was very difficult for a while, but love, faith and hope will overcome. Let the adventure continue!

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