Persuasion Out of Love

“Owe nothing to anyone except to love one another, for he who loves his neighbor has fulfilled the law.” Romans 13:8 NASB

 “I can will knowledge, but not wisdom; going to bed, but not sleeping; meekness, but not humility; scrupulosity, but not virtue; self-assertion or bravado, but not courage; lust, but not love; commiseration, but not sympathy; congratulations, but not admiration; religiosity, but not faith.” Leslie Farber

What I truly love about Christianity is how the Lord waits to be invited. There are no mandates, dictates, bullying, controlling, or manipulating. He asks. The Lord of Lords, the King of Kings, asks. He knocks.

What I love about the Lord is how he transforms me in the midst of pain and fear, not with pushing, bullying, condemning, or judgment.  He is with me in my darkest hour. He weeps with me. He prays for me. He “companions” me, whether I feel it or not. I experience a relationship with him.

Are you fortunate to have someone like this in your life? Being this way is a spiritual transformation.

All relationships have their ups and downs, misunderstandings, dark times, and good times, even and especially with our kids, parents, siblings and colleagues. But real relationships start with the heart. No change in the heart– no change. No change in the heart– no change in character. No change in the heart–no change in behavior. No change in the heart–no intimate relationship. Knowledge is good and helps, but it’s not the heart.

I managed a small marketing department and had four single head-of-house women working for me. They struggled, really struggled, being full-time parents, with financial turmoil and exes that were so toxic. It was up to me to make it work! Some had just a GED. No college. No technical training. They lived in harsh environments. The only reason they were working for me was that they had to. This was it. It looked impossible.

So, I loved them (and was humbled many times).  I acknowledged with praise what they did well. Learning was a fun, downtime activity. I knew their kids, their boyfriends, and even their parents. Most of all, I prayed for them. Most of all, I prayed for myself. Was there an unexpected pregnancy? Oh, yes. Utilities shut off. Top Ramen for dinner. But we worked, encouraged, lent a hand and cash, overcame and cared. Mistakes were made, but it drew us closer. Our Father brought us through.

Every one of these girls is now in adulthood with their own professional careers, loving husbands, and families with awards and accomplishments they never imagined. We are friends. We all were persuaded. We all were transformed. All have a spiritual life. It didn’t happen overnight, but it happened.

Musings

Whatever problem, person, or situation, prayer for an open heart, a persuaded heart is required. A miracle! We learn to see with spiritual eyes and a heart like our Father’s and his Son’s. We experience a joyful, loving relationship with our Father first and it flows to others. He persuades us and others.

Prayer

Dear Father,

We must see you first before all the things are added to our loved ones and us. Your Son said, “Apart from me, you can do nothing.” Oh, how we stumble upon this statement when our pulled-up-by-our-bootstraps mentality tempts us into self-sufficiency and toxic control. More harmful is being away from you. Thank you for persuading, asking, and gently encouraging us. Help us to do this with others, too.

Amen.