Arguments vs. Discussions

“An angry person starts fights; a hot-tempered person commits all kinds of sin.” Proverbs 29:22 NLT

“Discussions are always better than arguments because an argument is to find out who is right and a discussion is to find out what is right.” Aspiring Quotes

Time-out. That’s how I would discipline my son when he was mouthy or refusing to do his chores. The time-out was for me too. If I didn’t sit down and reflect, I would say things I didn’t mean, spew threats like grounding him until he was 30 years old and criticize my lack of parenting skills. Yes, it happened. More times than I can count. But with practice, parents get lots of practice, we could get to the bottom of the problem without drama, name-calling or tears.

Arguments happen at work, the grocery store, the church, and much to my dismay, in our governments. Emotional explosions happen frequently with little to no helpful resolve. Would we send these people to their rooms for some much-needed self-reflection and attitude adjustments? James says that someone who controls his tongue is a perfect man able to rule cities. But (sigh) our only control is self-control with the much-needed help from the Father. Prayer is quick sometimes while we breathe and count to ten or 100. We don’t want to commit all kinds of sins because of hotheadedness! Then the situation becomes worse—much worse. Through His word and the Holy Spirit, the Father wants our discussions to focus on the What, not the Who.

Musings

Paul Tripp wrote this and I find it very helpful: “How you treat your spouse is an opportunity to share the gospel. How you raise your kids is a forum for evangelism. How you do tasks and maintenance around the house or yard—and offering to serve your neighbor at the same time, for example—is a chance to put the sacrificial life of Christ on display.” What a tremendous responsibility! And it glorifies the Father. Actions do speak louder than words.

Prayer

Dear Father,

Thanks are not enough for all the arguments and angry words Your grace has covered. We commit to do better and then someone tempts us to anger and our resolve disappears. Help us carve out some time to reflect and obtain some wisdom for the What and not the Who.

Help us, with thanks, to remember all we do reflects Your Son.

Amen.