Hope For the Dementia Caregiver

Or, Caregiver for the Terminally Ill

Barbara Hinther, author of Meditations and Encouragement for the Caregiver of a Loved One With Dementia

“When you cross deep rivers,
I will be with you,
    And you won’t drown.
When you walk through fire,
You won’t be burned
    Or scorched by the flames.

3 I am the Lord, your God,
the Holy One of Israel,
    The God who saves you. Isaiah 43:2-3

There are 12-step programs for alcohol, drugs, co-dependence, gambling, and more, but I used the 12-step program, especially the first three, to cope with my husband’s Lewy Body Dementia. The 12 steps are based on a spiritual program and complement the scriptures very well, especially when dealing with a terminal disease like dementia. I used the 12-step program and some of its suggestions to navigate this darkness.

  1. Admitted we were powerless over alcohol and that our lives had become unmanageable. I substituted the word alcohol with the frightening word, dementia. We are powerless. Dementia does make life very unmanageable. God is with us.
  2. Came to believe that a Power (I inserted God) greater than ourselves could restore us to sanity. The dementia caregiver doubts their own sanity while navigating this horrible and terminal illness, especially at the end of the journey
  3. Made a decision to turn our will and our lives over to the care of God as we understand him. This is very difficult! My will was to have a healthy and present spouse. God’s will is never for harm. Our enemy is. The enemy has been called the Father of Lies and a murderer. Faith will be tested. This is the heartbreak of living in a Fallen World.

Notice that these first three steps focus on your emotional, physical, and spiritual health first and foremost. It must be! Your loved one needs a healthy caregiver. As has been said on countless airplanes before departure, put your oxygen mask o first. These first three steps give us a foundation and faith to cope.

Caring for your loved one with dementia, like the 12-step program, is a one-day-at-a-time process. Again, it must be! We must live in the present. There is a popular book, The 36-Hour Day, which describes the practical challenges of dementia caregiving. Our days are 36 hours or more!

The financial worries, the decision to commit your loved one to a care home or hospice, the midnight crises are to too much to take on alone. God walks with you. You can’t always feel his presence, but he’s there. God cares for you, so turn all your worries over to him. 1 Peter 5:7

The 12-step program also stresses outside help. With the isolation due to caregiving, help is still available. One may contact their local Office on Aging, hospital or care home social worker, websites and online blogs. I visited many dementia blogs and websites in the middle of the night and would receive love and support from other dementia caregivers from all over the world. Did it fix the situation? No. However, we can keep going knowing we are loved and we’re not alone.

But you will be alone more than you realize. Your friends and family may feel awkward and even afraid of your loved one’s illness. This happened with the demon-possessed and those with leprosy that Jesus healed. They don’t want to acknowledge that in this fallen world, this could happen to them. It has nothing to do with you. Don’t take it on. Enlist their help. They’ll feel relieved and glad to support in the way that they can. For instance, they can pick up prescriptions or groceries. Mow the lawn. Babysit your loved one so you can take a well-deserved nap. Pick up some takeout. Provide transportation to the doctor.

Ask a trusted, nonjudgmental friend to listen to you. Not fix the situation. They can’t.  They can be a companion in your dementia journey. They become an Empathetic Witness. They may not know what to say. That’s okay. Sharing your experience and feelings helps educate our communities, churches and synagogues. It reminds the community just how isolating caregiving can be. They, too, may be there someday. Sharing your story sheds light on the unique and stressful challenges of being a caregiver. I had an older, faithful dog that listened and comforted, too. Don’t discount the help of a faithful pet.

Local churches are willing to help. Fear of being overwhelmed by well-meaning converts may cause you to hesitate. Choose a faith/church you are somewhat familiar.

Keep a journal. You may share it with another caregiver someday. The best healers are wounded healers. Our Savior was wounded for our sakes and can relate to your suffering.

You will be on alert. Frazzled. PTSD-like. Tempted to drink too much, shop too much, eat too much and more—anything for immediate relief. When you do, forgive yourself, love yourself, have compassion for yourself and pray.

Forgive, when you are able, those who abandon you. It happens. That’s another unforeseen challenge that often happens to caregivers. You don’t want to add resentment to your trial.

The Serenity Prayer is another help I used, courtesy of the 12-step program. I used it daily and sometimes hourly. God, grant me the serenity to accept the things I cannot change, the courage (and it takes lots of courage) to change the things I can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

Until there is a cure, my heart and prayers are with you, fellow caregivers.

Are You Ordinary?

“Don’t copy the behavior and customs of this world, but let God transform you into a new person by changing the way you think. Then you will learn to know God’s will for you, which is good and pleasing and perfect.” Romans 12:2

“Do not ask your children
To strive for extraordinary lives.
Such striving may seem admirable,
But it is the way of foolishness.
Help them instead to find the wonder
And the marvel of an ordinary life.
Show them the joy of tasting
tomatoes, apples, and pears.
Show them how to cry,
When pets and people die.
Show them the infinite pleasure
In the touch of a hand.
And make the ordinary come alive for them.
The extraordinary will take care of itself.”
― William Martin

My grandmother died many years ago, but she still influences me every day.  Her name was June. She was the most loving, intelligent, and forgiving person I knew. She’s been gone for over 30 years, and yet I think of her every day with some wistfulness. She was what the world would call ordinary.

Baseball was her game of choice, cardplaying with grandpa and her friends, and the best homemade pies (still haven’t accomplished this). Staying overnight with her was a treat! Smelling the line-dried sheets on the vast bed, pancakes in the morning, games, and stories about her childhood during the Great Depression were mesmerizing. Her mother owned a small grocery store because she was raising two girls alone. How brave!  Sometimes her stories made me laugh, like her story about ice skating to school and how she met my grandfather at a farm auction. He noticed the kitten around her neck and said he wished he were the kitten. Her great uncle was wounded fighting for the Yankees during the Civil War.  He was an ambulance driver. I was amazed that he returned home at all.

She gave great hugs, warm, big, reassuring. Ordinary.

Musings

Throughout the day, throughout my life, and when boredom comes, when I’m alone and feel nothing I do matters, nothing makes a difference, I think of my grandmother. What a legacy she truly left me! She taught me love. Ordinary? Perhaps to the world. Then I remember all the ordinary things Jesus used to teach, encourage, and do. He encouraged our faith, even if it is as small as a mustard seed, and encouraged us to be salt and light. He was and is bread broken for us, living water so we won’t ever thirst. Ordinary. A legacy of love and grace for all.

Prayer

Father,

You bless the ordinary now and in heaven. We don’t see it, or feel it, sometimes. We forget that “a cup of cold water only” makes a difference. We forget we’re children of the Highest.  Please help us to do the next right thing, the ordinary, especially when weary or discouraged.

And thank you for the ordinary.

Amen.

Happiness is Not a Destination

“You make known to me the path of life;
    you will fill me with joy in your presence,
    with eternal pleasures at your right hand.” Psalm 16:11 NIV

“Happiness is when what you think, what you say, and what you do are in harmony.” —Mahatma Gandhi

A teacher gave her students balloons and instructed them to put their names on them, blow them up, and float them into the school’s hallway. They did as the teacher taught, with quizzical looks all over the classroom. The teacher then instructed the students to locate their balloons, which had their names on them, in the hallway. The hallway was filled with colorful balloons bouncing against the walls and floor, spilling into the classrooms.  The students couldn’t find their own balloons. The teacher then said to pick a balloon and find the person whose name is on the balloon. In five minutes with giggles and surprise, everyone had their own balloon. The teacher then said, “The balloons are like happiness. When you are chasing happiness, you won’t find it, but when you reach out to another, you will find it.”

Brilliant teacher.

And something as simple and colorful as a balloon really adds to the happiness of both children and adults.

Musings

No matter our circumstances, if we reach out to others, there will be a bit of bliss. Happiness is always a choice. My friend who recently passed away was stuck in a chair at home because she was so ill, but still managed to have coffee with me, along with lively conversations and great affection. A bit of happiness and memories of her company in an old farmhouse, I will treasure forever. I think I’ll send up a balloon with her name on it.

Prayer

Dear Father,

Thank you for your Son who always reaches out without punishment or condemnation. He said that others will know us if we love each other—happiness. Help us to realize and take in joy today.

Amen.

You Matter

You are Valuable

“For you know that it was not with perishable things such as silver or gold that you were redeemed from the empty way of life handed down to you from your ancestors, but with the precious blood of Christ, a lamb without blemish or defect.” 1 Peter 1:8-19 NIV

“People who add value to others do so intentionally. I say that because to add value, leaders must give of themselves, and that rarely occurs by accident.” John C. Maxwell

The recent tragedies all over our nation have grabbed the headlines. It should! From our government to specific businesses, to our youth, their actions say, “You don’t matter. You mean nothing to us. We don’t care you’re (fill in the blank).” They haven’t said so in words, but their actions demonstrate their lack of compassion and problem-solving in bold, capital letters.

“By their fruit you will know them.” “Actions speak louder than words.” We’ve heard this over and over. Still true.

There are also seemingly little things that convey someone doesn’t matter, like:

Kids should be seen and not heard.

They’re old now. What use are they?

That was last month. What have you done for me lately?

Remember when I did such-and-such? You owe me.

The world shuts out and shuts down a person’s value, unless they drink their Kool-Aid. But not the Father. He sent his son as an example and sacrifice for us. And we, in turn, are to do it for others.

You are valuable. You are loved. You matter.

Have there been people in your life who demonstrated their love as well as said it? They’re out there. My dear friend, who passed away recently, always had a pot of coffee and a smile. We did embrace and say we loved each other. Even during COVID, we’d have delightful conversations.

Have you had people in your life who said they loved you, but their actions said differently? Domestic abuse is one dramatic and tragic example.

Love is a verb. And it’s done whether we feel like it or not. Good feelings are nice, but they’re not the only thing; they can also be wrong.

Our Father demonstrated his love for us while we were hostile toward him and still does.

We will be powerful if we start and truly grasp how much the Father loves us! Here are a few verses that prove how valuable and loved you are:

1 Corinthians 6:20


1 Timothy 4:8

Psalm 116:15 –This one is such comfort. Our Father’s love for the saints who’ve passed on.

Romans 5:8

Ephesians 2:4-9

Romans 8:28

There are hundreds more.

Musings

“Self-care is a willingness to be happy and pursue joy,” Beatrice Chestnut wrote. I believe Christianity is a willingness to be happy and pursue joy. This is how we heal and help others. This is how we have an abundant life.

Prayer

Dear Father,

It’s so difficult to grasp how much you value us. We take it on faith and trust while the Holy Spirit transforms. We thank you for this gift. Please help us to help others realize their value, too.

Amen.

What is this Trying to Teach Me?

“Consider it all joy, my brothers and sisters, when you encounter various trials, knowing that the testing of your faith produces endurance. And let endurance have its perfect result, so that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.” James 1:2-4 NASB

“You may not control all the events that happen to you, but you can decide not to be reduced by them.” Maya Angelou

I do not consider it all joy when going through trials! I get tired. I get weary. I want to escape any trial. I don’t want to grow. I genuinely don’t want to endure! Then I read this:

  • Your pain was preparing you for strength.
  • Your failure was pointing you to alignment.
  • Your delay was protecting your timing.
  • Your joy was inviting you to presence.
  • Your loss was teaching you about depth and letting go. Yusif Ahmed

We can’t be complete, lacking nothing, if we don’t endure trials. Jesus himself told us we would have them, and we know he endured many trials. The promise we will be perfect, complete, lacking nothing, is what we must hold onto.

Musings

No matter how young or old, no matter our career or none, no matter if we have family, no matter our status, habits, possessions, or money, we are God’s special possession. As he is our Father, trials will come, but he will bring good out of them for you and for others. (Romans 8:28)

Prayer

Father,

We are to be joyful when going through trials. We aren’t. We are to be thankful when going through trials. We aren’t. We cling to you because we know you will bring good, and we love you for it.

Thank you for grace as we go through trials. Thank you for the gifts that come from enduring trials.

Thank you to your son for modeling this perfectly.

Amen.

Boundaries and Myths

“Brothers, if anyone is caught in any transgression, you who are spiritual should restore him in a spirit of gentleness. Keep watch on yourself, lest you too be tempted. Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ.” Galatians 6:1-2 ESV

“When we fail to set boundaries and hold people accountable, we feel used and mistreated. This is why  we sometimes attack who they are, which is far more hurtful than addressing a behavior or choice.” Brene Brown

Perfection. It’s not possible for you or me. This is when striving, willpower, and various gymnastics can drive us to make poor choices, especially during the holidays, family gatherings, and the workplace. And it cuts both ways. Others can’t do perfection. Only one man in all of history was perfect. We know what happened to him.

Someone once said, “I may not seem like much, but you should’ve seen where I started.” There’s so much truth in this. Growth is the best we can hope for on Earth.

Spiritual turbulence. Someone has criticized you for something you know is not true. Someone is manipulating you to loan money, show up for an event not right for you or your beliefs. There could be gossip, withholding affection, and many other people problems that tear us up. Worse, it could be family salting the wound. Then starts the “what ifs” and “I should do better, be better.” It paralyzes and stops us from saying no, reflecting on what has happened, and deciding if it’s true.

Myth: Boundaries won’t be painful or scary. Yes, they are painful and frightening, but “walking on eggshells” is no cake walk either. We don’t set boundaries alone. We have our Father. We have others to help us. We don’t scream, cry, beg, or manipulate. Nix the dramatics. We just state, unemotionally, what’s acceptable and what’s not. The best we are able. And breathe.

Myth: Boundaries mean all will be well. No. Many times, we lose that person in our lives. It can be freeing after some grieving and reflection. We may recognize patterns that need to change. We remind ourselves of our Father’s love for us and others who live in the Father’s love.

Myth: We only have to set them once. Once again, nope. Depending on the situation, the person, and the willingness you have to keep this person in your life, you will set boundaries over and over. Jesus set them with the Pharisees many times. If he did, count on it for us! Patterns.

Myth: Forgiveness is a one-time event. With prayer, support, and self-reflection comes forgiveness for yourself and others, but it is a practice. It may not have reconciliation, but peace comes.

Musings

On this side of heaven, we will never be perfect. We will never perfectly handle situations or people. We get better. Others will never be perfect. They get better. We are all at different places and came from different backgrounds. Some of us started life in a deep hole. Some of us had a loving foundation. The great equalizer: We are all doing the best we can with grace.

Is it true? Is it helpful? Is it kind?  These questions can be a helpful guide for you when communicating with others in your life.

Prayer

Dear Father,

Is it true? Is it helpful? Is it kind? Your Son modeled all of this for our sake. On the cross, he said, “Father, forgive them for they do not know what they’re doing.” Unconscious. Unaware. So much of the evil in this world would be gone if we loved as you do. We only have to practice this today, which is challenging enough, but your grace keeps us on your path. Thank you.

Amen.

Quick! Fix Me!

“And let us not lose heart in doing good, for in due time we shall reap if we do not grow weary.” Galatians 6:9 NASB

“The more we let God take us over, the more truly ourselves we become — because he made us. He invented all the different people that you and I were intended to be…. It is when I turn to Christ, when I give up myself to His personality, that I first begin to have a real personality of my own.” C.S. Lewis

I chose the NASB interpretation of this Bible verse because it says to “not lose heart in doing good.” It’s the heart that sits at the center of all we do, are, and become. It’s the heart God measures.

The work we do on ourselves with God’s help to become more like him seems impossible! Actually, it is impossible, but with God, all things are possible. This should be a relief!

 Relationship situations, our bad habits, depression, and discouragement are exhausting. Progress is hard to see. We overcome a challenge, and two more challenges are wagging and winking, sneering and taunting. Whack-a-mole!  And it’s true, whether nine years old or 90 years old, the job is not done. Perfection is not ours, and that’s where grace does its greatest work.

Sometimes the work we do is not our sin but the sin of others that wounded, pierced, and devastated us. And that “how many times do I forgive my brother—77 times” example from the Bible reminds us and haunts us. Heavy sigh. There may not be reconciliation, but forgiveness can still heal us.

If we were “fixed,” complete, done, there are many wonderful lessons we would miss, like:

Compassion

Empathy

Hope

Community

Patience

Perseverance

Humility—ouch!

Vulnerability—I wrote an article for Christian Living Magazine about being a caregiver. Even now, my shame from mistakes and loss of hope is burning my face and ears, but vulnerability and all of the above gifts keep me pursuing and encouraging caregivers. Caregivers are compelled to hide any weakness. They must be strong for the disabled or terminally ill. Until they aren’t. Until they crash. Until they ask for and receive help.

I’m sure you could list more from your life’s journey.

The bottom line is love. Grace is the tool. Gratefulness is the attitude. Those good feelings come. In the meantime, know God is with you, helping you and loving you.

Musings

The Lord’s Prayer instructs us to pray for our daily bread. It seems that our spiritual journey is a daily decision, and the outcome is God’s. In my marriage, the decision to be married was a daily decision. To be a good parent, a daily decision. To be a good boss, employee, or colleague is a daily decision. To love at all is a daily decision. Jesus told us to focus on today. God is the only one who sees the future, and if I focus on being more like him today, the “fix me now!” is resolved because my focus is on him.

Prayer

Dear Father,

We want to be whole, and we want it today. We want others to be fixed, and we want it today. We get tired, anxious, and discouraged on our spiritual journey to become more like your son. Remind us that the transformation and growth are yours, and my part is willingness. It’s a daily decision. Help us not to grow weary in doing good. Help us to remember all the good we’ve accomplished, because of you, with thanks.

Amen

When Someone Hurts You

And They Will

“But even if you should suffer for righteousness’ sake, you will be blessed. Have no fear of them, nor be troubled…” 1 Peter 3:14 ESV

“Do not look for healing at the feet of those who broke you.” ― Rupi Kaur

We will be hurt by someone we love. We will hurt someone we love. It’s a part of life and relationships. It’s risky. I remember the story M. Scott Peck wrote in his book, The Road Less Traveled, about a solitary woman. She went to church, worked, and came home to her cat. She had no conflicts. She had no turmoil or drama. Life was predictable and secure. She avoided all relationship hurt. She avoided all relationship joy. We all have seen someone like this. Perhaps, we were this.

Relationships are risky! They can hurt! A lot!

Here are three things to consider when someone hurts you:

You can let it define you. We pick up others’ opinions like adhesive tape. Someone once asked, “If someone called you a chair, would you be upset?” Of course not! We’re not chairs. But let someone tell us we’re too sensitive, shy, talkative, and on and on, we glue it to our hearts like the gospel.  It isn’t.

Let it destroy you. How many have been with family members or others who strike us, shame us, and dismiss us? How many came close to breaking down? I did. This is not suffering for righteousness’ sake. It’s martyrdom. It’s unhealthy for you, your children, and others who love you. How can God’s glory be in this?

You can let it strengthen you. Here’s where the rubber meets the road, and it’s not for the faint of heart—first, some self-reflection, not rumination. Second, prayer– hold nothing back, He knows anyway.  Third, seek support from a friend, group, or counselor—we need each other. Fourth,  Learn to set boundaries, or resentment will eat you alive, and fifth, a biggie, let it go. Some things aren’t worth the hassle. If it comes back, and it may, let it go again.

Jesus searched and studied the Word for His place and purpose. He “shook the dust off His feet” when unbelievers mocked and tried to trap Him. And He forgave. Forgiveness does not mean reconciliation; it may, but forgive for your sake. He didn’t “hang out” with those who wanted to harm him. The scary thing is he let them go.

Musings

When people are on their deathbeds, relationships are front and center in their minds and hearts. How much money they made, status, and possessions mean nothing. Relationships are the stuff of a full and abundant life here and in Heaven. The Bible is full of relationships! It reads like a melodrama at times, and it is, but it is full of insight. People haven’t changed. The problems they had then are the same problems we have now.

Prayer

Dear Father,

Thank you for our relationships, especially the ones we have with You, because Jesus cleared the way. You have provided everything necessary for healthy and loving relationships, if we seek them.

Help us find our identity and purpose in Your Son, not others. We appreciate praise and recognition from others, but we must not depend on these. We find ourselves when we find You.

Amen.

What’s Lacking in Our Lives?

“He who did not spare His own Son, but delivered Him over for us all, how will He not also with Him freely give us all things?” Romans 8:32 NASB

“The most important thing is who you become.” Dallas Willard

The most important thing: who we become. And this does not happen quickly; it comes with great difficulty.

My focus lately, probably yours too, is on lack. The gas pump resembles a casino lottery machine! The grocery store may have empty shelves, smaller packaging, and abhorrent prices. Do I buy a gallon or a half-gallon of milk? The birthday party will be a small sleepover in the backyard, rather than a bash at the roller rink. Forget about new carpet this year. Those nearing retirement have lost up to 50 percent of their savings. Some have lost more.

What’s missing?  Over and over in the Bible, our own nation’s history, and our humbling life experiences, we forget who is really in charge. We get “fat and happy.” We forget who truly and freely gives us all things and whose things they are—we’re stewards. But most importantly, our faith, our character, takes a beating. Our Father wants us to become something wonderful through the challenges. Something eternal. Something beautiful. Today. And our Father is not stingy. He said so. He doesn’t lie. “If you then, being evil, know how to give good gifts to your children, how much more will your Father who is in heaven give good things to those who ask Him!”

Trust. That’s what’s missing. Whenever we see a lack, it may be an opportunity. I think of planting flowers this time of year because I love them.  I plant one seed, but with time, I receive multiple blooms. It takes weeding, watering,  feeding and patience, but the reward is worth it.  Sharing the blooms is rewarding, too. I confess I am still a rookie when it comes to trust, but the eternal “sowing and harvesting” principle still applies. We always have something to give, no matter how humble.

Musings

Trusting our Father and Jesus is something we practice for the rest of our earthly lives.  Our Father has the past and the future in his hands. Our purpose is to live today fully and in trust. Like the Israelites stepping into the Red Sea, we step into today and watch with wonder. We freely give, like our Father, all good things. All things are His anyway.

Prayer

Dear Father,

We have been going through a tough time and anxiety rules. From the shock of prices at the grocery store, overwhelming bills, and unplanned expenses, we abandon trust in You. Like Peter, we say, “Lord, save me!” We control, complain and worry. Teach us “to cast our anxieties upon you because you care for us.”

Thank you. We trust you.

Amen.

You Belong!

“I will call those who were not my people, ‘My people,’ and I will call her who was unloved,‘My beloved.’”Romans 9:25 NET

“Friendship is born at that moment when one person says to another: “What! You too? I thought I was the only one!” C.S. Lewis

Being a Christian means we belong. We belong to one another. We belong to a king. We have a Wonderful Counselor. We have grace and freedom. We have a connection. We have love. We change. We grow.

 We belong!

My whole being was rejecting the daily mundane duties the other day.  My mind drifted off to high school.  Mind you, I haven’t thought about high school in years. They were harrowing, painful times of dramatic parents, dramatic me, and no connection or belonging. Someday I’ll share that. Why visit this time? Because there was a spot of joy. This spot of pleasure had been neglected for many, many years.

A sweet, shy, handsome Greek boy entered my mind. There isn’t even one celebrity who could compare to this young Greek!  My heart filled when I thought of him, back in art class in my senior year. The class was an hour I relished because of this deep, open, fun Greek student with whom I shared a table.  We shared so many things besides a table. He lost his mom at an early age. His parents emigrated from Greece. He felt awkward around girls. I shared my turbulent upbringing, how I hated liver and onions. Most of all, we laughed at silly things. Our guard was down, and we were authentic with each other. We winked at each other. We flirted. We laughed at our failed art projects. Teased. I couldn’t believe girls weren’t stalking him! What a vibrant, caring, fun, and lovely human being. We belonged.

Work and a personal crisis canceled my art class. We lost touch. Something scarce slipped away.  He was very shy. I was distressed at that point in my life because of teenage angst and confusion. We were no more.

Then he died. Age 18 years. He took his life. That permanent decision for a temporary problem. Belonging? Was that the issue? Belonging is as crucial to life as breathing. He didn’t want to breathe anymore. Of course, I wish I’d phoned him, shared more, and sent him a caring note. Shock! What-ifs are devastating and hard to ignore.

I prayed about him and gave him to my father, who loves this young man more than I did or do. I trust my heavenly father with him. Jesus died for him. He belonged and didn’t know it. May I be more aware of belonging to myself and others. I hope I see him again.

Musings

Belonging. Our father created us to belong. It’s as critical as our heartbeat. May we be brave enough to say, “What, you too? I thought I was the only one.” Slowing down and embracing what is and who is may prevent tragedy and enrich lives. Jesus invites us to his table. “Come! Eat and drink without cost.” We belong. There’s always room at his table.

If you are struggling with loneliness, pray, reach out to a counselor, pastor, or wise friend.  Someone wants you to belong.

Prayer

Father,

Thank you for the gift of belonging. Help us to reach out and be present. We don’t always know which soul needs a gentle touch, an authentic, listening ear, or a warm embrace—belonging. The daily challenges sometimes blind us to what is truly essential for another and our souls. Jesus invited everyone to his banquet. May we do the same.

Amen