Anger at God

Angry at God?

“Why is light given to a man whose way is hidden,

Whom God has hedged in?

 For my sighing comes instead of my bread,

and my groanings are poured out like water.

 for the thing that I fear comes upon me,

and what I dread befalls me.

 I am not at ease, nor am I quiet.

I have no rest, but trouble comes.” Job 3:23-26 NIV

“Do I really want God or do I merely want relief?” C. S. Lewis

I want relief. I have to be honest. It may come again because life is difficult.

Anger at God has been experienced by many Christians. I am one. Here are some reasons for those who admit they’ve been angry at God. Death of a loved one. Yes, I, too, have raised a spiritual fist at the Father, and the guilt I felt just added to the despair. I think of the many military spouses and children who have lost their loved ones and blame the government, enemies, but the hard and bitter truth to face is that the Father allowed it. He could have stopped it. He didn’t.

Addictions. The Father heals. The Father did not heal some. Why? How could you? Enter doubt. Enter questioning yourself and the Father. Could I have done better? Anything?

Illness. As a weary caregiver, I was angry. My husband was angry and frightened until Lewy body dementia took its place. Where are You, Father? “Yea, though I walk through the shadow of the Valley of Death, I will fear no evil.” I feared. I shook. I cried and cried. Sleep was scarce and interrupted.

Abandonment. This could be parents, friends, spouses, churches, even governments, or a sudden company layoff.How about war?

Financial ruin. There are so many ways money is plucked away from illness, to robbery, foolishness, addictions, or identity theft.

Some who claim not to believe in God may be angry at Him. Those who have turned their back on God may still have faith; they’re angry and can’t bring themselves to face this. It feels wrong. I know of a woman whose daughter joined a religious cult, and she and her husband tried everything to bring their daughter home. The daughter is still in the cult. Which brings me to…

Other Christians. Sunshine Christians. Flawed Christians. Snobby Christians. Weak Christians. Gossipy Christians. Arrogant Christians. Legalists. And more. We’ve been there too. We looked up to them, and they let us down. Of course they did! They’re not Jesus! Don’t let imperfect people come between you and God. There are no perfect people.

Sometimes it’s anger for something I did. And I’m not ready to admit it. Blame is nice for a bit.

Get Honest. The Father knows we are frustrated trying to understand things we can’t. Even if we knew why, it wouldn’t erase the pain and fear. Having someone say, “We live in an imperfect world, and we’re not in Heaven yet,” offers little comfort. We know this. It’s time to embrace the promise in Romans 8:28. He will bring good out of every situation if we love Him. We may not feel loving at this time, but we still love.

Being angry is not a lack of faith. Being angry does not mean you don’t love Him. It’s a part of being human and learning about relationships. Anger causes us to look, reach out, dig deep, and learn. It feels bad, I know, but going through it is better than being stuck, lonely, depressed and bitter.

Musings

From the poem, I Told God I was Angry, by Jessica Reynolds Shaver

“At last, you have admitted
What’s really in your heart.
Dishonesty, not anger,
was keeping us apart.”

 The whole poem is a beauty and a comfort. It’s available online.

Prayer

Dear Father,

Being angry feels wrong, especially when it’s anger at you. You have told us to lean on You, and not our understanding. We need to accept our anger and realize that life is not fair and that anger will visit us at times. Jesus was angry, but He did not sin. Help us to do the same.

Amen.