An Open Heart for Valentine’s Day

“Love is patient, love is kind, it is not jealous; love does not brag, it is not arrogant. It does not act disgracefully, it does not seek its own benefit; it is not provoked, does not keep an account of a wrong suffered.” 1 Corinthians 13:4-5 NASB

“Love does not dominate; it cultivates.” – Antoine de Saint-Exupery (Attributed). 

Willpower. Self-improvement. Workshops. Retreats. Books. Memorizing scripture. If there’s anything to do to make my life better, I’m up for it. Sometimes I’d be aware of what I needed to change and should change, like not swearing at the news. The more I tried, the worse it got! Stop smoking. You’re right, it got worse!  What was my focus? On not doing something. Gritting my teeth, white-knuckling behavior. Open? I think not.

Trying hard to be loved can become a trap, too, and it starts in childhood with earning good grades, being cute, or good behavior. We try hard to earn others’ love, God’s love too. We turn our attention to matters such as status, wealth, or validation, hoping these will bring us love.

We need to develop an open heart.

When we seek love, our focus is on ourselves. We can’t see outside of ourselves. When we “do” love, it’s there. Love is a verb, I heard. We can be a listening ear, an encouragement to a friend, a bouquet for a shut-in, or a warm hug. There are so many ways, and the focus is where it should be. We feel better about ourselves and life when we “do” love.

Musings

Earning our Father’s love is futile because He is love. He already loves us. We can’t earn another’s love because they will or they won’t. It’s wonderful to do something kind for someone we love, but it’s no guarantee they will love us in return. We love our children from the day they’re born, and they’ve done nothing to earn it.  But they’re so open to it! Love does return to us, but not necessarily the way we expect. Sometimes even better than what we expect!

Prayer

Dear Father,

Thank you for wanting a relationship with us. A real relationship!  One that encourages us, teaches us, loves us, and guides us. Like all relationships, there are dark times and good times, lonely times and celebratory times, but all are for good. I appreciate your patience as we learn and grow through our transformations.

Amen.