Who is Driving Your Bus?

Who’s in Charge?

“For I know the plans I have for you,” declares the LORD,” plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.” Jeremiah 29:11

“People who need to control others don’t have control over themselves.” Unknown

I’ve heard the statement, “Who’s driving your bus?” from many Christian and secular speakers. I ask myself that question every day, especially when embarrassed, angry, frustrated, or dwelling in the past.

My sister traveled many miles to visit me, and when she returned home, she told my other sister that my curtains were dirty and gray. How could she gossip like that? How could she travel and focus on my dusty curtains? I was incensed! She took a long trip to be together, and my curtains were her focus. I told this sister and the other that related the information how small, how nitpicky, how uncaring. And blah, blah, blah. I proceeded to hurt myself and ruminate on it for days! I stepped in it. Her comment behind my back lived in my head rent-free. I took the comment personally and continued to hurt myself with it. Who’s in control? Do I value clean curtains over more important matters? Will it matter in eternity? Whose problem is it?

Mine. All mine. The battle within. Warring with the mind. The ego is in charge. The temper-tantrum wins. How much control do I have over people, places or things? Sibling relationships really test us. They may be the most instructive because they wound the most. Lesson learned.

I took the immature, tantrum-throwing me out of the driver’s seat and asked the Father to be in charge.Oh, and washed all my curtains. I asked the Father, “What is this really about?” It wasn’t curtains. It was dredging up all the negativity from my childhood, living in that muck again. Who wants to live like that? Time to let go and laugh.

Musings.

Every day is filled with choices—big choices and little choices. Who’s making the choice? The past, another, or the Father? How easily the wounded child takes over! How difficult to embrace and take in the love from the Father, especially when another is in our heads. That’s why there’s grace and practice. Relationships give us lots of practice. It’s the “iron that sharpens iron.” Relationships can be pleasant, joyful and rewarding, but they also reveal so much about our wounded past that needs to be accepted, healed and let go.  In this world, Everyone is wounded.

Prayer

Dear Father,

We thank you for our relationships. The most difficult relationships are the ones that teach us about ourselves. How we marvel at how much you love! We can be more effective, more joyful, more peaceful, more generous, and wiser when we meditate on how much You love us. Help us to do so today and love others.

Amen.