Sin Management

“Likewise, you who are younger, be subject to the elders. Clothe yourselves, all of you, with humility toward one another, for ‘God opposes the proud but gives grace to the humble.’” 1 Peter 5:5 ESV

“Your greatest life messages and your most effective ministry will come out of your deepest hurts. The things you’re most embarrassed about, most ashamed of, and most reluctant to share are the very tools God can use most powerfully to heal others.” Rick Warren

The more touchy we are, the more we’re covering up. The more we explain, the more we’re hiding (I did this in trauma counseling). The sarcastic comeback, yep, avoiding and building oneself up at the other’s expense. Hiding receipts, substances, food, or porn, shame is calling the shots, and puffing ourselves up with money, power, beauty, or status is hiding a big wound somewhere.

Sin Management. I think it was Dallas Willard who coined the phrase. But Sin Management is something we’re all guilty of. We want to look better and be better than we think we really are. There is nothing wrong with wanting to be better, but without honesty and courage, humility it ain’t!

Defensive parent. My parenting. I was a good parent but I made some whopper mistakes. Divorce always shatters and confuses kids. I own at least half. And never enough money or time as a single parent. My ex and I, at the very least, co-parented. When my son brings up something I’ve done that harmed him, I want to hide. But it’s there. It’s hurting both of us.

Defensive caregiver. Caregiving my dying husband. Soooo many mistakes and every one of them comes into view during the grieving process. Grief groups are a safe place to vent them. Someone there has experienced what you’re feeling and can help you ease the burdens.

Are you defensive about something?

The best thing to do is to take it to our Father who guides and helps without judgment. Be open to His nudges. And don’t condemn yourself when you go two steps forward and one back. Remember: “There is no condemnation to those who are in Christ Jesus.”

Musings

As long as we’re here on planet Earth, we’ll be defensive about something! We will slide again and again into sin management. There will be progress in hindsight most times but we can always be honest with our Father. The Prodigal Son finally was. His homecoming was a momentous blessing of love, mercy and second chances. We are the Father’s Prodigal Son or daughter.

Prayer

Dear Father,

We want to be bigger, better and successful. We don’t like looking at the things that are hidden and cause us to be defensive. If we don’t admit these things to You, we’re lost. If we don’t take these things to You, we remain on autopilot with no self-awareness, healing, growth or wisdom. We remember how fortunate we are that we can be like the Prodigal and come home with no condemnation or punishment. “He who fears punishment is not perfected in love.” Perfect us in your love.

Amen.